My Slow Descent Into Health

Day 7

One week in and I’ve gotten an incredible amount of support. I want to thank you all for that. It has made it so much easier to start working out.

I have also realized that whether you’re 230 lbs or 140 lbs, you probably have EP (pronounced “eep,” short for “exercise paraphernalia,” see Day 4 for my current list).

Today I’m going to tell you one particular favorite example of EP I have. About five years back I had just bought some video EP. I bought Jillian’s 30 Day Shred (actually some some weight with that one, can’t lie), and some foofie ones that seemed like a great idea until I watched them. One of those was the Burlesque Pussycat Dolls work out DVD.* The routines were simple and fun, but definitely not a real work out. This video is the type of video that us Moms forget about and later becomes our son’s first soft core “porn.”

I did the routine a few times but my favorite time has to be the night I had a girl friend come and drink. Have you ever tried work out videos drunk? I’m not going to “suggest” it, but I am going to say it’s a life experience worth having if you’re staying in and drinking with some of the girls. One of the “routines” called for a feather boa. The winter scarves were flying and we had a blast. We were twerking way before Miley even thought about asses and we definitely had no idea that we were doing that. Good times, good times.

Anyways, today we did a work out from hell. I did more squats than I can currently remember. I threw around a weighted ball. I was using a 35 lb bar that I had to learn the form for most of the time. I was on a rowing machine** and we did box jumps.

Box jumps for beginners is like, not jumping, but taking a massive birth canal stretching step up on this wooden box thing that I thought were just seats, and then stepping down. Repeatedly. I mean, I saw them yesterday and could tell they were for “working out,” but I could not even imagine how. Now I know. Husband rubbed some Tiger Palm on my upper chest after poking me there playfully and I shrieked.

I had an egg for breakfast (I had to run out the door, it was quick), spicy black bean burgers for lunch, and no dinner yet (It’s 3:35 pm here). I also had some chocolates because my dear friend brought me some from Germany and they were delicious. Especially the bitter chocolate ones. Never had that before and I’m a fan.

Signing out.

*Girls don’t lie. You probably have a Carmen Electra Strip work out or have at least considered what it would take to do a pole dance work out. Hell, I’d probably have a pole in my house if I didn’t consider the emotional damage it would do to my children.

** Which I’ve been in love with the idea of those since Kevin Spacey was on one in that Netflix tv show. Three minutes on one has taught me that looking bad ass and being bad ass are two different things.



5 comments on “Day 7

  1. Helen Bragdon-Tinkler
    December 23, 2014

    Get on with your bad self! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Erika McNamar
    December 27, 2014

    Hah! I’m pretty sure I do have a Camen Electra one! And my Flirty girl fitness ones, most of which have not even been opened!


    • Noel Marie Ross
      December 27, 2014

      Hahaha, next time you come over youll have to bring that!! I havent watched it yet! Wine and a work out? Hahaha


  3. The Fit Mom Diary
    December 28, 2014

    I shall not lie…i watchded the Carmen Electra striptease workout when it was available OnDemand. How are you workouts/meals coming along?!?!


    • Noel Marie Ross
      December 29, 2014

      Could be better. I’m up today with renewed motivation. Having to admit my days of shortcomings (Day 12) has humbled me.


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This entry was posted on December 23, 2014 by in DEC2014 and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , .
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