My Slow Descent Into Health

Day 50 (part 2)

I went to a yoga class today. It was fun, challenging, and I was by far the heaviest person there. I forgot how intimidating regular gyms can be.

I got there early, so I was able to have one of the trainers there show me the equipment they have and how it works. A lot of it looks like really good stuff. There were a few things there that I think could help me improve my form and improve my max’s for reps in lifting. The trainer was very helpful so that felt good.

I went into the class and it was a completely different atmosphere than I’m used to. The instructor is a woman I work out with at Crossfit so it was nice knowing someone and she was friendly and encouraging. It was nice having someone there that knows my story, what I’m trying to do, and how hard I’ve been working at it.

A majority of the other women there didn’t even look at me. I will give them the benefit of the doubt though. A lot of them could very well have just felt like they were there to get their yoga on. I understand that. It’s a very introspective work out. It probably didn’t help my mind set personally that I was staring straight on into that phenomenal mirror wall.

It’s been made clear to me today, that losing the weight will be a majority of the battle for me. However, I do believe I have a lot of skin that will be an issue for me as well.

It’s hard to realize that and be okay and comfortable with it, but I’m getting there. I spent a lot of time heavy, so it’ll take some time to adjust into health as well. When I get down to where I want to be I will probably look at where I am and gauge if I think it’s necessary to have medical intervention in the skin department.*

Also, at my Crossfit gym, the people I work out with are friendly and work together to accomplish incredible work outs. I think that’s how gym’s and Crossfit differ (besides the work outs and such). At the gym, it seems taboo to be sociable. At Crossfit, it’s kind of the way of it. We compete, we encourage, we uplift. You get used to that comradery and thrive off it. I think being around these new people once a week will take some adjustment, and it will really take me becoming comfortable with myself and my journey. I’m really okay with that.

Today for food I had eggs and a banana, for lunch I had a salad with salmon and an egg,** and I’m not sure what is for dinner yet. I’m thinking about making something with some sweet potato and steak? Not sure. I’m excited to go cook though.

What I didn’t eat: Nothing was super tempting today. I feel much better about my direction and dedication. There’s up’s and down’s on this journey. I have to appreciate the up’s.

Signing off.

* It would be such a damn shame if I lost all this weight only to carry an awesome FUPA around.

** Pictures on Instagram, which has a lot of great encouraging work out profiles as well. My handle is noelmarieross.

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