Remember that one time I was talking about having to figure out what I want to be when I grow up? Now I’m considering the health field. Honestly, I just think it would be great to help get healthy eating information out there, and to share my experience in order to help others through whatever their struggle is. Maybe a nutritionist, or a personal trainer, I’m not sure where yet. It is definitely something that I can see myself being passionate about. I think it would be exhausting, but I also think it could be really positive.
I think back to every time I started “dieting” or working out. I would barely push myself, and I would complain. And I definitely never stuck to it. It wasn’t until I had a long chat with Ass Kicker that I realized it was okay to have a hard time. That this is how it starts, and she wasn’t going to give up on me either. I needed that push, that confidence to even start. I still have quite the journey ahead, but I think if I could pay that back to one person, I will have done well. Try to pay it forward in some way. If you’ve been failing at taking care of your health for a long time, and you’re addicted to sugary/crappy food and binge eat, believing in yourself is the last thing you’re going to do. Having a person there to say that “What you’re going through is normal and okay, and here is how I beat it,” made 100% of the difference.
A part of me feels like it’s been forever since I started. Another knows I have only just begun. I am only 1/6th of the way into the journey. My life has really begun to change and it’s fascinating, amazing, and scary as hell. Sometimes my own words intimidate me in the process of writing them. I’m too far in. I can’t fail. I can’t give up. These thoughts had to turn into- I won’t fail. I won’t give up. I enjoy this. It’s still at the beginning of this change and like I said, it’s miraculous and terrifying.
Being in the life style I have, some days are just harder than others. The stress can feel insurmountable, and then you feel like you can’t complain because your partner more than likely has it worse, and you know it. If you’re an emotional eater, you can easily gain twenty plus pounds and not even realize it’s happening.
It’s okay. What you’re going through is normal. You can beat it. I can beat it. I am beating it.
Today this morning I had eggs and bacon. There’s this one type of approved bacon, and I finally got it. I will not be doing that again for a while. I definitely tore that up. I mean, it’s bacon. For lunch I had a salad and for dinner I had a half-chicken grill. I ordered out, and it was delicious. I appreciate that I feel okay doing that when I know what to order and what to stay away from. Bread is getting easier to stay away from again. A beer would be nice though. Maybe I’ll have a glass of wine. (Let’s be honest, I probably won’t yet. I’m on a roll and I’m doing okay.)