I live what some would consider a fairly average American life. I’m thirty-two, I am married (for the second time, not all of us get it right on the first try) and have three small children. When I wake up, I get kids ready for school, feed my toddler and set off to see how much I can actually accomplish while paying attention to said toddler, and making sure he doesn’t demolish my townhouse with his bare hands. If I remember to in, all of that, I pre-set dinner. Those are the good days. The bad days, I’m lucky if I make it out of yoga pants, and feed the kids peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or something of equal nutritional value with out just burning everything to the ground. Parenting and house keeping 24/7 is not for the faint of heart. Some will tell you how easy and wonderful it is. I am not that person.
Usually the most adult and intellectually challenging thing that I am asked in my day is “What’s for dinner?*” So, often I turn to my smart phone. The wonderful land of all the articles. I turn to my friends working in the government, my friends who are becoming lawyers and doctors, my friends who took the path that I did not, and I just want to debate. I want to discuss. I want to be intellectually challenged. I’m not always eloquent, and sometimes mid-discussion of the islands South China has built as a “sea grab,” I have to yell, “Do not put that in your mouth!!!” and “Please, please just sit and eat.” but luckily I have the type of friends who laugh it off and probably thank their lucky stars they’re not doing that at the moment.
I know I share articles that lean left, and some that are not so friendly and very opinionated, but it is not my intention to offend or spread hate. Most of the time I skim articles (right and left leaning) and look for facts and sources to form an opinion on. Some (not all, I’m still doing my life stuff) of those rather annoying opinionated articles have amazing sources, and solid facts. So I share them with out necessarily thinking that some are going to look at the opinion, get mad, and look away with a confirmation of a leftist bias that I really wasn’t trying to perpetrate.**
Sometimes, I’m sucked in my phone too much. For that I am sorry, and annoy probably more that just my Facebook friends and family. Sometimes I’m so interested in the pro’s and con’s of handing over more control to the states since America is the size of Europe like, a few times over that I miss what’s going on around me. Sometimes I’m sitting down digesting the very real possibility of an inevitable war based on America’s economics (whether Hillary or Trump won, funnily enough) that I dismiss what could be real conversation going on around me. Even if it is just “Hey Mom, I can round house kick,” and “Look at this new project I’m working on.”
I’m trying, and I know I’ll do better. For the sanity of whatever friends I have left that follow my Facebook posts, and for the sake of being more involved with the day to day things which are too valuable to ignore. Finding a balance to both when the world is going crazy has been a challenge. However, I don’t think I can give it up completely. I also desperately need that mental and intellectual challenge to break up the monotony of what my lifestyle currently is. For the last twelve years, I’ve been taking care of one toddler after another. I’ve been giving up myself and my life for a very, very long time. I do not regret that. Not even for a second. But man, what I would give for a newspaper article to discuss over coffee instead of online with out having keeping track of everything going on directly around me. How I yearn for a job that challenges me and gives me things to accomplish daily that are more than just what is expected and necessary. Maybe a job at a newspaper that has coffee? I mean, some days I don’t even plan out dinner, how fracking*** depressing is that?
I hope this clears stuff up, maybe saves a friendship or two that I know I’ve been unintentionally edging out. I know all I discuss online is politics. But rest assured, I never really talk about it anywhere else. Or really, anything else. Everything offline is about home life, and most times that’s a never ending cycle of report cards, Hulk smashing, and doing hair. Most of my friends who have lived near me at one point or another know this. No matter how combative my “Facebook life” is, I’m still me. I’m still here. Just as frazzled and coffee driven as ever.
** Have you tried finding articles with out any opinion? It is hard my friends. Now there’s a damn challenge.
*** See what I did there?